Abortion! A word that is whispered among many due to the fear of stigmatization. This act is not legal in many countries, but it does not mean that it does not happen. We are quick to judge those who abort children without giving them an ear. What if it was a forced abortion? Should we condemn the victims to death? In as much as this remains a controversial topic in the society, everybody deserves a second chance in life for there is no little or big sin.
Statistics tell us that more than 40 million pregnancies are terminated even if they are illegal. Even though we are not condemning those who do it, we are not justifying the act. It may be wrong in our eyes but try to put yourself in the shoes of a person who is forced to abort a baby. This decision may come with relief for a person who can’t raise the child but also cause, grief, sadness, and depression. We will discuss how to cope with such feelings to help victims in similar situations.
What are the feelings that come with abortion?
According to the American Psychological Association Task Force on Mental Health and Abortion, most victims suffer from depression. Each person experiences different feelings depending on the circumstances surrounding it. One thing that remains constant in all situations, is the grief of the loss of a child. It may bring regret, guilt, and feelings of worthlessness.
This can lower the self-esteem of a person and may cause suicidal thoughts in victims who cannot bear the shame and guilt. It causes stress and may bring confusion due to going against religious beliefs. Some women let the emotions affect their life such as interrupting their sleep, eating habits as well as their sex life.
How to cope with an abortion
This loss of a child requires you to plan how you are going to begin your healing process. Deal with grief by mourning the loss of the child. In a case where you have been forced by an unsupportive partner to abort, take time to grieve without going back to your normal life immediately. This will help you deal with the guilt or regret of your decision.
Watching out for triggers that may bring back memories will prevent the tears. It might be a pregnant person or even the presence of the person behind the decision. Plan how to face them afterward so that their presence does not interfere with your mental state.
Acknowledge your feelings
Accepting what you are feeling will help you heal. By the use of a journal write down the emotions as you acknowledge your loss. This will keep you from depression as you let out your feelings safely in writing.
Avoid substance abuse
The stigma that comes with abortion makes most people conceal the secret for years as they bury their guilt in drugs and alcohol. Seek help from RI recovery resources to free yourself from drug abuse as you get people you can open up to. Such facilities offer you cognitive behavioral therapy for you to open up to a professional.
Confide in a reliable friend
Get a person who has gone through a past abortion. Sharing your feelings with them can help you minimize anxiety. Such a friend can make you feel less judged even though most people might not understand. They can also accompany you to the doctor in case you need any medical assistance such as getting anti-anxiety medication. Choose who to share this information with wisely to avoid being the topic of criticism among others.
Take care of your physical health
Observing a healthy diet and taking iron supplements will help you recover from the abortion. Take foods rich in iron to gain back your energy. You can also do light excises and sleep more to calm your nerves. The healing process requires you to maintain healthy practices.
Distract your mind
There are many ways you can focus your mind from negative emotions that can come from abortion. Surround yourself with positive energy from entertainment, laughter, and relaxation. For instance, if you feel like crying, watch a comedy to lift your spirits. You can also inspire yourself through books that make you see life positively. Meditation can help you calm your nerves as you appreciate the beauty of life.
You can also cultivate your hobby as you release your emotions in art or songwriting. Let what you love doing be a platform to express your personality. Your hobby can help you find a new purpose in life without feeling condemned due to past mistakes.
Renew your spiritual faith
An abortion can make you disconnect from your faith. Pray about it as you seek for a pardon from God so that you can renew your faith. Interact with church leaders and share your story as they help you grow spiritually. Join a supportive group in church so that you can interact with people who may not be too judgmental. You can also find a mentor in a Church to help you get past the emotions.
Learn from the experience
An abortion can teach you how to handle sex better in the future. Take lessons with you from what you have undergone to make wise decisions regarding your partner as well as lifestyle. For instance, if the unplanned pregnancy came as a result of many sexual partners, you can learn to stick to one. This mistake can also make you understand yourself better so that you can develop standards regarding your life. It also helps you make better decisions without feeling pressured to give in to other people’s demands.
Let go of the guilt through forgiveness. Start by forgiving yourself for not fighting enough for your baby. This will help you raise your esteem so that you can stop self-blame. If another person is responsible for your decision, find it in your heart to forgive them. You will find peace through forgiving so that you can focus on the future.
Though abortion may not be moral, helping a person who finds themselves in this situation is the right step to take. Instead of pointing fingers, we should offer sex education to our girls as we support those who are victims of circumstances.